


japanese boy scouts

by angel_cult



Category: Hunter X Hunter
Genre: Chatting & Messaging, F/F, Group chat, Hisoka Being Hisoka (Hunter X Hunter), IS THAT AN ACTUAL TAG ABHAHAHA, M/M, chatfic, chrollo is pining, is that how you say it, leorio is so done, like he’s signing away his will rn, tsundere kurapika
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-03
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-16 17:55:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 3,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29828727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/angel_cult/pseuds/angel_cult
Summary: femboy: welcome to my sex dungeoncrusty old grandpa: i swearcrusty old grandpa: i will hurt you one day
Relationships: Gon Freecs/Killua Zoldyck, Hisoka/Illumi Zoldyck, Kurapika/Kuroro Lucifer | Chrollo Lucifer, Machi/Pakunoda, Uvogin | Ubogin/Shalnark
Comments: 13
Kudos: 79





	1. an introduction

**Author's Note:**

> kurapika: femboy • he/they  
> leorio: crusty old grandpa • he/him  
> gon: fisherman • he/him  
> killua: weather boy • he/him  
> hisoka: pennywise • he/they/xe  
> illumi: edgy goth • he/they  
> chrollo: cult leader • he/him  
> machi: amylee33 • she/they  
> pakunoda: cult second leader • she/her  
> shizuku: airhead • she/her  
> uvogin: girly girl • he/him  
> shalnark: twink • he/him  
> feitan: another edgy goth • he/they  
> phinks: hulk smash • he/him  
> nobunaga: quirky?? • he/him  
> alluka: queen alluka • she/her  
> kalluto: taller than feitan lol • he/they  
> melody: mother • she/they

** chlorophyll me up daddy  😩💦 **

edgy goth: can someone tell hisoka that just because of his unmatched earrings he’s not cool

pennywise: :(

edgy goth: choke

crusty old grandpa: bye same with kurapika and his little sock handwarmer things

femboy: first of all its called fashion asshole

femboy: recycling you ffuckng arse

weather boy: kurapika ur so bad at spelling it makes me want to die

fisherman: you already wanted to die fuck off

mother: can yall stop arguing in here i’m trying to make pop tarts

femboy: when i get home can i have some

mother: sure :))

cult leader: sometimes i forget that melody is pika’s foster mom

edgy goth: where’s the rest of ur cult

cult leader: we’re at mcdonalds i’m the only one texting

weather boy: i want mcdonalds now

fisherman: same  🤨

crusty old grandpa: mhm

femboy: i’m not going anywhere with that musty sperm cell

cult leader: are you talking about me

femboy: yes

cult leader: but pikaaaaa  😩

femboy: no

pennywise: i breathe only to watch chrollo get rejected by kurapika for the hundredth time

edgy goth: he’s never giving up is he

cult leader: nope  😵

femboy: fml 

femboy: wait they have an emoji for that omg  🤦♀️

femboy: and one for emo  🖤

crusty old grandpa: why do they get so excited over these childish things hdfjgjgdgj

femboy: girl u know why

weather boy: trauma?

femboy: yuhh  🤑

edgy goth: kurapika has like never told us about his trauma

pennywise: thought this was a therapy gc </3

femboy: ill tell yall when i’m ready smh

cult leader: update uvogin scared everyone off and we don’t all fit at one table

fisherman: uvogin and phinks are fucking massive thats why

crusty old grandpa: how many tables did u have to split up in sdhsdkhsdh

cult leader: hang on ill send yall the seating arrangements

cult leader:table one: phinks, feitan, pakunoda, machi, chrollo the magnificent

cult leader: table two: shalnark, uvogin, shizuku, nobunaga

femboy: why did u put the magnificent next to ur name

cult leader: i’m not answering ur messages youll attack me

femboy: smart choice

weather boy: is 6ix9ine like

weather boy: gay

fisherman: what

weather boy: i’m just saying he wears way too many rainbows to be completely hetero

pennywise: no but you have a point..

crusty old grandpa: he literally advocates ass shaking women in every single music video

crusty old grandpa: what part of that screams ‘homo’ to you killua

weather boy: they’re his beards duh

fisherman: waiting for a 6ix9ine gay scandal

edgy goth: god help i just walked in on my brother watching hentai

pennywise: which one

crusty old grandpa: WAS IT KILLUA LMFAO

edgy goth: no

weather boy: no

crusty old grandpa: gosh darn it

femboy: and you wonder why we call you a fucking grandpa

crusty old grandpa: that was uncalled for and quite frankly it hurt 

edgy goth: it was milluki

fisherman: expected

edgy goth: i am traumatised

pennywise: acting as if you already weren’t

edgy goth: ...

edgy goth: valid. have a bad day.

pennywise: what animal do yall see me as

pennywise: because i took a test online and it said a ginger cat and that is not correct

weather boy: a bearded dragon named blaze

pennywise: omg.

pennywise: really

weather boy: yes

weather boy: i have a leopard gecko named blaze but i’m scared of him

crusty old grandpa: where are alluka and kalluto

edgy goth: they have school until four because they’re still in middle school

fisherman: onto another topic is it really appropriate for middle schoolers to be on this gc

crusty old grandpa: definitely not but we move

weather boy: where are kurapika and chrollo

pennywise:  😏

femboy: stfu

femboy: i was eating the poptarts melody gave me after i got home from school

cult leader: i’m literally in mcdonalds uvogin and phinks are throwing fries at each other

cult leader: and machi is hitting them

cult leader: nvm paku stopped her

cult leader: fucking hate gays ugh

weather boy: suspicious

femboy: no its really not

femboy: why would you assume that im automatically screwing someone whenever i leave

edgy goth: you have an abnormally high sex drive to be fair

femboy: that is false information i disagree

crusty old grandpa: i literally walked in on you with a stranger in the school bathroom

pennywise: please send details

crusty old grandpa: riding lol

edgy goth: that’s kinda unsanitary kids

amylee33: i was about to ask why chrollo’s face is red but i just checked the gc and i now know

amylee33: we’re teasing him if that makes anyone happy

femboy: you better delete those messages melody is in this gc

crusty old grandpa: ok


	2. akaku

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kurapika: femboy • he/they  
> leorio: crusty old grandpa • he/him  
> gon: fisherman • he/him  
> killua: weather boy • he/him  
> hisoka: pennywise • he/they/xe  
> illumi: edgy goth • he/they  
> chrollo: cult leader • he/him  
> machi: amylee33 • she/they  
> pakunoda: cult second leader • she/her  
> shimizu: airhead • she/her  
> uvogin: girly girl • he/him  
> shalnark: twink • he/him  
> feitan: another edgy goth • he/they  
> phinks: hulk smash • he/him  
> nobunaga: quirky?? • he/him  
> alluka: queen alluka • she/her  
> kalluto: taller than feitan lol • he/they  
> melody: mother • she/they

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter was kinda short because the first one was an introduction but we move

** chlorophyll me up daddy 😩💦 **

weather boy: fuck off

fisherman: strong words for a child

amylee33: isn’t killua older than you

fisherman: ...

weather boy: THATS WHAT I FUCKING THOUGHT

weather boy: its all good i love you

cult leader: thats gay

cult second leader: chrollo youre gay

cult leader: i’m a child of the lord

cult second leader: lord kurapika

pennywise: all hail lord kurapika

edgy goth: akaku  🛐 akaku  🛐

mother: i leave for four minutes and suddenly my foster child is a religious symbol

another edgy goth: just another day for the survey corps

weather boy: wrong anime levi

another edgy goth: would you do me a favour and shut the fuck up for one fucking second

girly girl: feitan can speak more than 3 word sentences and hate paragraphs to hisoka????

airhead: the world is evolving at an alarming rate

twink: i see the entire cult has gathered

twink: how are we doing today

quirky??: i’m doing shit

quirky??: why the fuck did i take triple science

twink: hello everyone :))

another edgy goth: i hope a bird shits on both of ur shoes

twink: what the fuck

pennywise: jesus

edgy goth: i-

weather boy: who pissed in ur cereal this morning

amylee33: bottom on bottom crime

femboy: anyone wanna commit arson

weather boy: kurapika can you fucjing chill for once

crusty old grandpa: kurapika no you will not be committing arson

femboy: dont tell me how to live my life lreoio

crusty old grandpa: lreorio paradinight

crusty old grandpa: yep

crusty old grandpa: thats me

femboy: this is bullying

edgy goth: christ

edgy goth has left the chat

femboy: wow lreoio you made him leave because of ur mean attitude 

pennywise added illumi.zoldyck#2457 to the chat

edgy goth: stop adding me back hisoka i will fucking kill you

pennywise: you need to stay its kurapika slandering night

cult leader: i’ve arrived to defend my partner

femboy: no offence but fuck off

femboy: i’m just a poor orphan i don’t deserve this

crusty old grandpa: rt to have kurapika and his mess of a life deleted

weather boy: rt

fisherman: rt

pennywise: rt rt

amylee33: rt

cult leader: i’m not retweeting :/

femboy: rt

crusty old grandpa: wait


	3. chrollo wants a kiss and kurapika encounters a spider

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kurapika: femboy • he/they  
> leorio: crusty old grandpa • he/him  
> gon: fisherman • he/him  
> killua: weather boy • he/him  
> hisoka: pennywise • he/they/xe  
> illumi: edgy goth • he/they  
> chrollo: cult leader • he/him  
> machi: amylee33 • she/they  
> pakunoda: cult second leader • she/her  
> shimizu: airhead • she/her  
> uvogin: girly girl • he/him  
> shalnark: twink • he/him  
> feitan: another edgy goth • he/they  
> phinks: hulk smash • he/him  
> nobunaga: quirky?? • he/him  
> alluka: queen alluka • she/her  
> kalluto: taller than feitan lol • he/they  
> melody: mother • she/they

** chlorophyll me up daddy  😩💦 **

femboy: MU FUCKING

femboy: AAAARSEEEEE

femboy: OH MY GOD OHBMY GOD OH MY FUCKING GOD LEORIO KILL ITMPPLESDE IM BEGGING YOU

crusty old grandpa: nHEJDJWJDKE NO

edgy goth: i’m sorry what the fuck is going on

pennywise:  💧 0 . 0 ⭐️

amylee33: hisoka we get it you have quirky mismatched earrings you don’t need to bring it up every four fucking seconds

another edgy goth: ye

weather boy: n e ways what’s happening pika 

fisherman: yeah leorio give us some insight

cult leader: i would also like to see what’s going on with my soulmate 

crusty old grandpa: a spider just crawled onto their hand he’s shitting himself

crusty old grandpa: like their body fully took a screenshot 

crusty old grandpa: now he’s screeching 

weather boy: please send video proof

crusty old grandpa: **[62878293.png]**

edgy goth: i

pennywise:  👁

amylee33: BAHAHAHSJAH

cult leader: it’s okay my love i will save you

airhead: i’m getting a bad feeling about this

girly girl: you are not the only one

twink: uvo come back to bed pls

crusty old grandpa: ok i killed it

femboy: thank the lord

femboy: wait no chrollo don’t come to my house

femboy: chrollo what are you doing on my lawn

femboy: chrollo

cult leader: can i have a kith

femboy: NO YOU CANNOT GET OFF MY LAWN PLEASE

cult leader: but i don’t want to

femboy: LEAVE ME ALONE PLEASE PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE  😭

cult leader: but ill be the flynn rider to your rapunzel 😩

fisherman: already got the hair tbf

weather boy: barz 🤑

edgy goth: help i’m at hisokas house next to pika’s this is so funny

pennywise: pika i left my shirt at ur house the other day csn you give it back 

femboy: mf you live 3 yards away from me it shoudlnt be that hard to come over here

edgy goth: why’d you leave your shirt at their house 

femboy: it was stained with blood lolzies 

edgy goth: why-

pennywise: i fell 

pennywise: onto a blood bag

pennywise: but i love how close i live to pika shejejdjd

femboy: our bedrooms are opposite each others 

femboy: so he throws rocks at my window at 3am

femboy: it is not fun

femboy: and i hate it

pennywise: i’m just trying to recreate the taylor swift mv but you aren’t cooperating so

edgy goth: fuck this i’m leaving 

pennywise: wait no

pennywise: baebee nooooo

femboy: wait where did chrollo go

femboy: CHROLLO GET AWAY FROM MY WINDOW

weather boy: I LEFT FOR 2 MINUTES PLEEAAASE

crusty old grandpa: this is fuckingm terrifying kurapika i’m leaving ur house yoi can deal with chrollo on ur own

femboy:  🥲

femboy: holy lord he opened the window

cult leader: ok update kurapika is hiding in the bathroom

cult leader: i’ll get him out  😉😏

mother: um

mother: why are you two shouting 

weather boy: melody i don’t think that’s shouting

fisherman: yeah maybe you should leave the house for an hour or two xxxxx

mother:  🤠 what 

cult leader: get y’all’s minds out of the gutter

femboy: yeah we were just arguing 

cult leader: well i wouldn’t call it arguing 

femboy: chrollo shut up before i castrate you in this bathroom 

cult leader: point understood 


	4. rustling of the jimmies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kurapika: femboy • he/they  
> leorio: crusty old grandpa • he/him  
> gon: fisherman • he/him  
> killua: weather boy • he/him  
> hisoka: pennywise • he/they/xe  
> illumi: edgy goth • he/they  
> chrollo: cult leader • he/him  
> machi: amylee33 • she/they  
> pakunoda: cult second leader • she/her  
> shimizu: airhead • she/her  
> uvogin: girly girl • he/him  
> shalnark: twink • he/him  
> feitan: another edgy goth • he/they  
> phinks: hulk smash • he/him  
> nobunaga: quirky?? • he/him  
> alluka: queen alluka • she/her  
> kalluto: taller than feitan lol • he/they  
> melody: mother • she/they

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw :: suicide mention,, only as killua’s joke but its there nonetheless

** chlorophyll me up daddy  😩💦 **

quirky??: does anyone actually understand this homework

cult leader: idk i don’t do homework

edgy goth: i understand it but i’m not telling you

pennywise: will you tell me  🥺🥺

edgy goth: no

weather boy: will you tell me 

edgy goth: ok

pennywise: that’s racist

crusty old grandpa: mf how is that-

taller than feitan lol: it just is :/

cult leader: kalluto????? texting in the gc?????? and not just to hate on feitan?????

taller than feitan lol: thanks for the idea

cult leader: oops sorry fei

amylee33: poor feitan </3

another edgy goth: fuck you all

another edgy goth: and fuck school it hasn’t taught me shit

another edgy goth: i learnt everything from tiktok and wattpad  🤚

crusty old grandpa: tiktok and wattpad i-

another edgy goth: some pornhub here and there

femboy: don’t support pornhub they have child porn on there

fisherman: period bestie  😩🤚

edgy goth: WHAT DID YOU LEARN FROM PORNHUB

another edgy goth: A LOT

femboy: why is melody laid down on the floor drowning in pride flags

mother: i’m showing my support for you

femboy: you can barely breathe,, let alone live your life as a gay ally

cult leader: kurapika..

femboy: no

pennywise: byehsjwjdj i just had a fun idea

pennywise has changed user ‘femboy’ to ‘tsundere~’

tsundere~: fuck you

tsundere~: BYE THE COLON WITH THE SWIGGKY RHING LOOKS LIKE A WONKY PENIS

weather boy: PIKAJSJSJDJE

fisherman: GOODBYE

edgy goth: i really don’t know why i put up with you all

cult leader: that name hurts me

tsundere~: that’s the point

cult leader:  😣😢😭😦☹️

tsundere~: 😐

pennywise: hearts been broke so many times iii i i don’t know what to belieeeve~~

weather boy: mama said it’s my fault  😓 it’s my fault  😦 i put my heart on my sleeeve

another edgy goth: see im not the only one who learns shit from tiktok

edgy goth: stfu feitan

another edgy goth: .....

amylee33: any1 wanna come commit arson

amylee33: i’m outside a corner store i think i’m gonna use a dumpster

tsundere~: i’ll come  🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️

airhead: hello how is everyone  😊

pennywise: i’m coming

pennywise: maybe pika will let me hit it for once

edgy goth: you fucking what

cult leader: .. 🙂🔪

pennywise: .. 😦🔪

tsundere~: .. 🏃‍♀️🏃‍♀️

cult leader: see you scared him off

edgy goth: kurapika i’m coming with you

tsundere~: if we run fast enough we can lose them and still meet up for the arson committing

edgy goth: good idea

weather boy: ayo gon jusr fell off the roof so 

weather boy: my family is out what do i do

crusty old grandpa: i’ll come over smh

amylee33: my family is also out twins

hulk smash: triplets

girly girl: quadruplets

pennywise: my family is

pennywise: well

tsundere~: shkskskdjdjejdjed

tsundere~: time out i am ✨🧚 disassociating ✨🧚

weather boy: ohejdkwkkde

cult leader: 

pennywise: 

edgy goth:  😡

pennywise: i am deeply sorry

weather boy: leorio is outside my house

weather boy: oh my god it’s a homosexual 

tsundere~: killua ur a homosexual

weather boy: stfu femboy hooters nobody asked you

fisherman: can you come fix my arm i am dying

weather boy: how r u typing with one arm flawlessly

fisherman: idk killua ig i’m just a different breed  😈🥶👊💯

edgy goth: i’m going to pretend i didn’t just read that text

crusty old grandpa: ^^

tsundere~: anyways i thought we were committing arson..??????????

tsundere~: no flames are in my sight lets get it going people

crusty old grandpa: pika ur gonna get arrested one day

weather boy: i almost got arrested once omg

weather boy: a cop said that my school bag looked suspiciously like a body

weather boy: number one - what body is small enough for that

pennywise: a child

weather boy: ....

weather boy: ok

weather boy: number two - the only person i plan on killing is myself sir

fisherman: ur not allowed to do that  😍

amylee33: ok i’m back

girly girl: welcome back ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

cult leader: uvogin

cult leader: uvogin how did you do that

girly girl: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

hulk smash: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)rustle ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)my ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)jimmies ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

cult leader: HOW

airhead: this has gone too far

another edgy goth: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

airhead: EVEN FEITAN 


	5. surprise shawtyyy

_** chlorophyll me up daddy  ** _ 😩💦

pennywise: if youre waiting for a waiter doesn’t that make you the waiter

edgy goth: fucking HELL ITS FOUR IN THE MORNING GO TO SLEEP

pennywise: sleep is for the weak

edgy goth: sleep is for the people who still want to go on a date with their boyfs tomorrow

pennywise: fuck

pennywise: you got me there

edgy goth: yes i have

edgy goth: actually no everyone wake up we’re bullying hisoka

tsundere~: bullying hisoka i’m in

crusty old grandpa: me too

cult leader: mhm

fisherman: yeeeep

weather boy: what gon said

user edgy goth has added user mxlluki.anime#7483 to the chat

edgy goth: hi we’re talking abt how much we hate hisoka i thought u could contribute nicely

mxlluki.anime: OK FOR ONE THING

pennywise: why is everyone awake rn

edgy goth: OH SO NOW YOU WANNA SLEEP HUH

second cult leader: christ what happened now

user weather boy has changed user mxlluki.anime to ‘waifu’

waifu: ayo girl @tsundere~

waifu: you send??

crusty old grandpa: GET OUT OF HERE

pennywise: NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE DO NOT TOUCH PIKA

tsundere~: i have balls

cult leader: ARF ARF ARF ARF GRRRR GRRRRR RUFF RUFF RUFF RUFF BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK

user edgy goth has removed user waifu from the chat

tsundere~: thanks bestie

pennywise: wait yall are bestfriends??

edgy goth: no

tsundere~: yes

tsundere~ .... 🙂

edgy goth: yes

cult leader: illumi do you mind if i steal ur brothers anime figurines

edgy goth: absolutely not do it

weather boy: go for it they creep me out

taller than feitan lol: mhm

queen alluka: ^^

edgy goth: why are you two here??

queen alluka: i’m here to help

taller than feitan lol: i’m here to make things worse

edgy goth: you two need to go back to sleep ur like 9

queen alluka: i’m 11 actually

taller than feitan: i’m twelve stfu

pennywise: i’m gay

pennywise: sorry

cult leader: fuck it we’ll just pull an all nighter

tsundere~: i’m already out lol

crusty old grandpa: where the fuck are you what

tsundere~: with machi

tsundere~: we’re either going to get ice cream or commit a felony idk we’ll decide in the car

mother: ok be back by 6

tsundere~: thanks :)

crusty old grandpa: 

crusty old grandpa: why do you allow this

mother: allow what

crusty old grandpa: i i’m not even trying anymore

weather boy: ok 21 questions time

weather boy: @girly girl uvogin what’s ur biggest weakness

girly girl: i’m hella uncooperative

weather boy: give me an example..?

girly girl: no

weather boy:  😐

edgy goth: hisoka would you like to explain why ur following mia khalifa on instagram

cult leader: are we really surprised?? i mean

tsundere~: ^^

pennywise: thats a great question

pennywise: yk i really think that  🎤 šallWãrAśęNàī 🥰 KìMì 😸 Wã ⛓ šHöJô 👻 Nâ 💅 ñÖ? ✨ böKù 🌸 Wâ 🧚♀️ ýARiçHiñ 🤴 BįCChĪ 😼 ńO 😩 oSû  💦 Dà 🎉 YO 💧

edgy goth: i hate you

edgy goth:so much

pennywise: you love me

edgy goth: unfortunately

tsundere~: WAIT WAIT

cult leader: OMGOMGOMGOMGOMGOMG

tsundere~: i just showed this to machi she almost crashed the fucking car holy lord

pennywise: you love me??????

edgy goth: BYE

pennywise: SHAWTYY COME BACK

pennywise: COME BACK

edgy goth: SHUT UP

weather boy: illumi you loooooovveeee hisoka?  😏

edgy goth: ok and we’re not talking about the chemistry with chrollo and kurapika in todays texting

quirky??: ChEmIstrY??  🧪

second cult leader: stop

weather boy: we’ll fangirl over those two later rn we’re talking about you

edgy goth: fuck you all

edgy goth: hang on why is hisoka at the front door

edgy goth: youll wake my parents up stop

edgy goth: now he’s climbing onto the balcony wtf

weather boy: he looks like spider-man

pennywise: surpriiiiseee shawtyy

edgy goth: get out


	6. a scintilla of kurokura

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kurapika: tsundere~ • he/they  
> leorio: crusty old grandpa • he/him  
> gon: fisherman • he/him  
> killua: weather boy • he/him  
> hisoka: sangwoo kinnie~ • he/they/xe  
> illumi: edgy goth • he/they  
> chrollo: cult leader • he/him  
> machi: amylee33 • she/they  
> pakunoda: cult second leader • she/her  
> shimizu: airhead • she/her  
> uvogin: girly girl • he/him  
> shalnark: twink • he/him  
> feitan: another edgy goth • he/they  
> phinks: hulk smash • he/him  
> nobunaga: quirky?? • he/him  
> alluka: queen alluka • she/her  
> kalluto: taller than feitan lol • he/they  
> melody: mother • she/they

c **hlorophyll me up daddy** 😩💦

pennywise: SHUT THE FUCK UP KILLUA

weather boy: IM NOT THE ONE WHO THINSKS THAT MINECTAFT IS BETTER THAN ROBLOX

pennywise: IT IS BETTER WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU ON

weather boy: YES BUT ROBLOX HAS ALL THE EXTRA ADDED GAMES

pennywise: YOU CAN FUCKING DO THAT ALL ON MINECRAFT YOU DUMB FUCKIMG CATBOY

weather boy: CAT BOY? FUCKING REALLY?

edgy goth: and hello to my favourite person

pennywise: hi lol

girly girl: *jazz music stops*

edgy goth: who the fuck?? i was talking to the ray of sunshine named killua zoldyck

edgy goth: not you fucking sangwoo kinnie headass 

cult leader: that’s a good name

cult leader has changed ‘pennywise’ to ‘sangwoo kinnie’

sangwoo kinnie: accurate

another edgy goth: caught in 4k  📸

sangwoo kinnie: illumi will you be tbe yoonbum to my sangwoo

edgy goth: i’ll beat ur ass before you can break my ankles but you can fucking try

crusty old grandpa: the name is kinda long though 

sangwoo kinnie: yk what’s not long 

sangwoo kinnie: ur dick

crusty old grandpa: how the fuck would you know

sangwoo kinnie: ur bathroom windows are rather clear when you have the powers of spider-man

crusty old grandpa: IT WAS A COLD SHOWER

crusty old grandpa: and also i will now be covering my windows thanks

sangwoo kinnie: and why was it cold leorio 🙂

crusty old grandpa: sweats 

crusty old grandpa: next question

sangwoo kinnie: ((  ༎ ຶ ‿ ༎ ຶ ))

weather boy: what the fuck is that

sangwoo kinnie: what you see in the corner of ur room every night during sleep paralysis

weather boy: how did u know i get sleep paralysis

sangwoo kinnie: i know everything 

edgy goth: he went through our families medical files

sangwoo kinnie: illummiiii  💧 •-•  ⭐️

tsundere~: i’m sorry why did someone call me the mom of our friend group 

cult leader: who’s the dad

crusty old grandpa: me

cult leader: mmmm that’s illegal

tsundere~: i’m the least fucking parental figure here

tsundere~: HISOKA WOULD BE A BETTER MOTHER THAN ME

tsundere~: AND HE USED TO KILL BIRDS WHEN HE WSS BORED

edgy goth: he what

tsundere~: he threw them at my window when we were younger and said that he was reviving them and making them fly

sangwoo kinnie: oh god that brought so many memories back

tsundere~: my mom used to ask me why there were dead pigeons in our dumpster

tsundere~: now she

tsundere~: well now she’s dead ig

tsundere~: #ihadnochildhoodnowimtraumatised

weather boy: i’m sorry kurapika commits arson virtually every weekend why in fuck would he be our mom

sangwoo kinnie: the gods have spoken kurapika is our mother now

mother: i’m keeping that title thx

mother: pika honey you’d be a terrible mother

tsundere~: THANK YOU

mother: you’re welcome problem child

crusty old grandpa: BJDKD

weather boy: ma’am who’s ur favourite 

mother: gon

hulk smash: that was expected

amylee33: honestly are y’all actuallt surprised

quirky??: idk why i’m in this gc i never reply but yes

cult leader: you need to start fucking replying

quirky??: no my ponytail is too swag 

cult leader: it looks like fucking broccoli when you get out of the shower

girly girl: broccoli head 

amylee33: hey don’t say that

another edgy goth: it’s an insult to healthy foods

weather boy: was that a haikyuu reference

quirky??: youre a piece of shit

weather boy: @gonur melody’s fave

fisherman: wait what

weather boy: i want to be offended

weather boy: but if i was a parent gon would be my favourite child too

cult leader: whipped

weather boy: i’m sorry

weather boy: as if chrollo “hey kurapika can i confess my undying love for you again” lucilfer is telling me that IM whipped

cult leader: i’m leaving you guys never stop bullying me

pennywise: you won’t be missed

edgy goth: yeah stay out

cult leader: yk one day i really will go

twink: chrollo ily and we all love you but we can’t defend you in this 

cult leader: fine then i’m going

user cult leader has left the chat

user tsundere~ has added user chrollolucilfer#1038 to the chat

tsundere~: don’t leave 

cult leader: okay

tsundere~: thank you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> debating on bringing shura from the hxh the last mission into this because did you FUCKING SEE the chemistry he and kurapika had in their fight...😟 idk maybe he could be pika’s ex or something and that triggers the kurokura through jealousy 
> 
> omfg making chrollo suffer by having pika and shura get back together 😩😩😩😩


End file.
